It's that time of year again, when Simon Cowell gets to make young girls cry with a single flourish of his trademark wit - "You are without a doubt the worst singer I've ever heard. There are antique mahogany fireplaces with more dancing ability, and as for your fashion sense, Jesus Christ! Did you dress in the dark, from a skip, with your eyes closed?" being just one example I've made up myself. Time for Sharon Osbourne to console the 16-year-old single mother whose dreams have been crushed underfoot like a snail beneath a breezeblock, and then throw water over her fellow judges, making sure the cameras catch it for posterity. And for Louis Walsh to put through the tone deaf, and coincidentally Irish hairdresser and then act surprised when Simon folds his arms across his chest, somewhere just below the belt line.
X Factor is back! And as an all-too-neat tie-in, Where Are They Now revisits the first year of the show, when anything seemed possible. We all remember the standout performer from that year. How he wowed us with his stage presence, youth and good looks, and sheer balls-out attitude. Then Tabby got voted out and we were left with a choice between G4 and our subject for this article, Steve Brookstein. Which is like choosing between being beaten senseless with a rock, and being strangled by a boa constrictor. Anyway, where is Steve now? [Toni Kelly]
Steve's official website (I know, I couldn't believe it either) says he has a new single, "Fighting Butterflies", out on the 18th of September. This year. It's available from all good shops, and the back of Steve's car (but hurry, before it's repossessed!) It's followed a week later, because there's no justice in the world, by Steve's "original album of songs" (as opposed to carpet samples?), 40,000 Things. While normally I would joke about 40,000 being the number of copies the album will sell before it gets deleted, the fact that it'll be roughly a quarter of that amount kind of stymies that one.
His Wikipedia entry includes quotes from the man himself, among which he makes a very good point - that in the eight months prior to the show he had performed 200 hours of paid gigs, and supported Dionne Warwick. In the same period afterwards he sang for 35 minutes and recorded an album of covers. What Steve doesn't mention is why he thought that was surprising. Anyway, there you go. A very easy search turns up some information we'll all have forgotten tomorrow. But check out that official site, he has an enormously cheesy video podcast on there that's well worth a laugh.
