The Top 5 Rehab Stars: The Celebs who reoffend again.. and again

I don’t know what the lure of illicit substances is, as for every wild high you get a definite down, but somehow stars keep on dabbling. Maybe it’s the attraction of escaping from their own ‘stressful’ lives, or perhaps they just have inclinations towards the dark side. Whichever it is, there are some persistent bad boys out there that I thought I’d bring to your attention.

Number 1: Amy Winehouse

How could Ms. Winehouse not be top of the list? Amy is the most recent from our top five to go into rehab, entering on 14th August 2007. Unfortunately, however, she did not complete her recommended 6-8 week stay, checking herself out after just 5 days. There has been much speculation about Amy’s new husband, Blake Fielder-Civil being to blame for her drug abuse, but she recently spoke out against this, saying, “Blake is the best man in the world. We would never ever harm each other.” We wish Amy the best of luck for the upcoming weeks.

Number 2: Kate Moss

Kate Moss’s highly publicised rehab visit in 2005 resulted in the loss of many lucrative contracts for her, including Chanel and Burberry. She completed her stay at the Meadows Clinic in Arizona, staying for 30 days in total. Kate’s drug problem was exposed when pictures of her supposedly snorting cocaine where printed in a British newspaper. The pictures where taken in a London studio where Ms. Moss had been with then-boyfriend, Pete Doherty. Kate remained calm and collected throughout the whole affair, conquered her addiction and was not charged. Now we’d love to see Amy taking a leaf out of Kate’s book.

 

Nu Number 3: Britney Spears

In February of 2007, Britney Spears voluntarily checked herself into rehab after many reports of drugs and alcohol abuse. Pictures had been plastered all over newspapers and the Internet for weeks previously of her hard partying, and unfortunate flashing of her lady parts. Unfortunately, Spears had had enough after 24 hours, and checked herself out again. Her rehab attempt came weeks after her apparent collapse on New Year’s Eve, and her friend’s pleas for her to get help. However, Spears is still partying hard, and the release of her new single, Baby Boy, should hopefully help her get back on her feet, although it has received mixed reviews so far.

Number 4: Lindsay Lohan

Ms. Lohan, who has just turned 21, Checked herself into the Wonderland Centre in West Hollywood in January 2007, following three car crashes and four hospital visits, spanning over the last two years. After checking out, she regularly attended Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, although she later said she never considered herself an addict. After another car crash in May 2007, Lohan entered the Promises rehabilitation facility in Malibu when police found a ‘usable’ amount of cocaine in her Mercedes Benz. She stayed there for 45 days, and later said, “it is clear to me that my life has become completely unmanageable because I am addicted to alcohol and drugs.” Since then, Lindsay has been booked on felony charges of possession of cocaine and transportation of a narcotic – in addition to misdemeanour charges of driving under the influence and driving with a suspended license. She was later released on $25,000 bail. In a statement released later that day by her attorney, she was said to be “safe, out of custody and presently receiving medical care.”

Number 5: Nicole Richie

Although Nichole has been arrested more than once, is pregnant with her first child and has done time in jail, she still claims that if she could go back in time and have a second chance to try heroin, she would still say yes. Richie was first arrested in February 2003 in Malibu, California, and charged with driving with a suspended licence and possession of heroin. After this arrest, Nichole, who was shunning rumours of an  eating disorder at the time, checked herself into rehab to address her weight problem. Nichole has recently announced her first pregnancy and told friends she is loving her new curves and boobs.

[ Words and Research : Chloe-Anne Ride]

Courtney Love blames Steve Coogan for Owen Wilson’s suicide bid

Since the reported suicide attempt by Hollywood A-lister Owen Wilson, the accusatory fingers have been pointing. Was it the fault of ex-girlfriend Kate Hudson, now happy in the arms of Dax Shepard or was it comedian Steve Coogan? Yes, the funnyman best known for putting Norwich on the map as Alan Partridge has been accused by none other than his ex Courtney Love for Wilson’s drug-fuelled problems.

True, the two are friends and Coogan has had some problems with addiction in the past, but the claims seem wild even for Love. She rages: ‘Under normal circumstances I wouldn’t comment but I care too much about Owen. I went through it with Steve. I tried to warn Owen. I tried to warn his friends.’ Could Coogan be the bad influence or is Courtney crazily mouthing off again?

In the news: Jessica Biel is a Wonder, and Keira Knightley is slim

-Kate Nash refuses to be labelled, as she says she’s far to posh to be considered a chav. “I think the press really wanted me to be a chav because of the way I sing. I’m way too articulate to be a chav. I’m the new Posh, me.” [Daily Star ]

VENICE, ITALY – AUGUST 29: Keira Knightley attends the Atonement Photocall during Day 1 of the 64th Annual Venice Film Festival on August 29, 2007 in Venice, Italy. (Photo by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images)

-Hot to trot Jessica Biel is set to play Wonder Woman (a stretch for her then) in the hotly touted Justice League of America. We can’t wait for the skintight costume shots…[E ]

-Trailer trash superstar Courtney Love is in talks to design a clothing range. I’m envisaging a safety pinned Amy Winehouse meets Barbarella ensemble with added accessories from jilted boyfriends. Far be it for me to say she’s unqualified, as she fights back at criticism with the following statement of her suitability as a future fashionista. ‘I know a lot of people are doing lines but my first job, other than stripping, was on ‘Mommie Dearest’ as an assistant in wardrobe’. Um, OK. [Jezebel ]

-Keira Knightley may look super fine, but herself esteem is slightly less. She’s bugged about her presence, and hates being called anorexic. “I haven’t got a clue about how much I weigh. I do not own any scales. And I have noticed it creates an anger in people who are not skinny. People like to blame their insecurities on other people.”

Sienna Miller dating Brothers & Sisters actor

NEW YORK – JULY 11: Sienna Miller arrives during the screening of “Interview” hosted by The Cinema Society and Dior Beauty at the Tribeca Grand Screening Room on July 11, 2007 in New York City. (Photo by Peter Kramer/Getty Images)

So who is dating Sienna Miller? First she was supposed to be getting it on with P Diddy, then came talk of Sean Bean, and then… phew, I’m exhausted just thinking about it. It’s like that scene in Spartacus when all the slaves revolt and stand up and shout “I’m Spartacus.” Maybe if you ask any guy if they’re getting jiggy with Sienna, an attractive, young, single girl and they’ll all pretend they are.

Well after endless gossip about the boho pixie’s love-life, news has leaked that she is actually dating Brothers and Sisters actor Matthew Rhys. The pair were introduced by the posh-voiced and pouty Keira Knightley back in May and have been keeping their new romance on the down low ever since.

A big-mouthed chum has been dishing the dirt: “This is the first bloke Sienna has been serious with since she finally split with Jude.” Ooh – so it’s serious then is it? Can I buy a hat or should I just wait and see if P Diddy or Sean Bean decide to slug it out for their woman?

[via Now magazine]

[Image via Getty]

Courtney Love sets her sights on David Walliams

LONDON – MAY 10: (UK TABLOID NEWSPAPERS OUT) Actor David Walliams arrives at a private gig to be perfomed by Prince at Koko on May 10, 2007 in London, England. The pop superstar is due to play ’21 Nights in London’ in the capital later this summer, starting on August 1 at the O2 Arena. (Photo by Dave Hogan/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** David Walliams

David Walliams, star of Little Britain and famed serial womaniser might find himself in a sticky situation soon enough as Courtney Love has declared her plans to bag him as her boything. Scary.

Each of the stars has a rather colourful relationship history with David being linked to nurse-gone-amateur pornstar Abi Titmuss and ex-Spice Girls mentalist Geri Halliwell. Courtney of course gained fame as the ex-wife of Kurt Cobain. But she seems to have gotten a taste for the Brits after being linked to Noel Fielding from BBC3 show The Mighty Boosh.

Courtney has apparently told pals that she wants Walliams to star in her new film about Nirvana – and hopes offering a role to the 35-year-old will help her to get close to him on set. A friend told the Daily Star: “She thinks he would be brilliant in it and says he is uber-fit. She’s vowed to get her claws stuck into him and finds him hilarious.”

Sounds like more of a threat than a request to me David. Run for the hills! (Oh, and have you seen her new teeth?!)

In the news: Britney may be in the baby way and Lindsay Lohan looks lovely

-The lovely Lily Allen is at it again; blogging intimate details about celebrity friends for the whole MySpace community to read. her latest gaffe? Apparently ‘hanging out with Courtney Love made her want to go to rehab’. Nice. [The Sun ]

-Is that a bump Britney Spears is showing? The singer who has worked so hard to lose her post pregnancy pounds may be in the family way again. The question of the daddy is also an issue, with rumours saying Britters isn’t sure which man impregnated her. Could it be former lover and drug counsellor, John Sundahl, or her bodyguard, Daimon Shippen? She’s come a long way from her virginal days… [Metro ]

-Girls Aloud are planning to grow up, and no I don’t mean they will start lowering their hemlines or addressing each other as ‘Women’, but instead they plan to create a more ‘adult’ sound. ‘We’re obviously getting older and we always, you know, like to try and push things forward‘, said Kimberly. [Digital Spy ]

-Keeping off the booze seems to agree with Lindsay Lohan if her tanned toned bikini clad physique is anything to go by. Her ankle monitor unit is still prominent but she manages to carry it off with decided style. Sigh. [TMZ ]

Top 5 Worst Celebrity Mums: The stars who should never have been allowed to procreate

My mum is tops, and like a good daughter I am suitably adoring. But I know others aren’t so lucky and have to struggle on as best they can by themselves. Some women are just not naturally maternal and as such can find motherhood a struggle. But celebrities excel at everything, don’t they? If they can sell out concerts in minutes, win Oscars and pen best-sellers and all the while look radiant and flawless, then surely they must make perfect parents? We bring you the top 5 most questionable showbiz mums, and honestly it was hard limiting it to five (Britney didn’t even make the list!)

Number 1: Kate Moss                             

Yes, Kate Moss has a child. A four year old girl in fact, called Lila Grace who lives with her. Kate is one of the world’s most photographed women, constantly makes headlines internationally and yet her daughter remains mysteriously mysterious. On the one hand, this could be due to Moss protecting her precious infant from the intrusive media glare, but on the other it could be that she’s been too busy getting high, ‘designing’ Top Shop clothes and dating Pete Doherty to notice that crying bundle in the corner (I suspect the latter.) With a mum known for drugs, sleeping around and looking like a gaunt tramp, we should book Lila Grace her spell in rehab now.

Number 2: Whitney Houston                  

Cocaine Kate is a junkie novice when it comes to Whitney. The ex Mrs Bobby Brown is mummy to 14 year old daughter Bobbi Kristina Houston Brown, but her parenting duties never held her back when it came to her partying ways. Her own sister even sold a picture to the National Enquirer of her bathroom cluttered with drugs. But it’s not just the drugs. Whitney has a rumoured eating disorder, has sold off her own clothes to stave off bankruptcy and was being sued by her own father when he died in 2002. She has undergone rehab, with many fans hoping that with her recent divorce from bad influence husband Bobby Brown, she can finally sort herself out. News that she is now dating infamous sex-tape star Ray-J rains on that parade.

Number 3: Dina Lohan                       

The fact that I have even heard of Lindsay Lohan’s mum says it all. The ultimate ‘pushy mum’, Dina is an attention-seeker, happy to ride the coat-tails of her famous daughter to achieve her own fame. She has indulged and even benefitted from Lindsay’s much-publicized addiction problems and has used the media as a tool in her war against her former husband and Lindsay’s jailbird father Michael. In Hollywood she has surreptitiously campaigned to earn a spot as one of the presenters on US talkshow ‘The View’ and is now in talks to do a reality show tentatively called ‘Mom-ager.’ This programme will follow Dina as she tries to turn Lindsay’s younger siblings — Ali, 13, and Cody, 11 — into stars. Well, the first child turned out so well, so why not?

Number 4: Courtney Love

Courtney had a troubled childhood and having learned from the experience, seems to have successfully provided her own daughter with one as well. Love is most famous for being the widow of Nirvana’s Kurt Cobain, a marriage which spawned their now 16 year old daughter Frances Bean Cobain. Yes – shit name, even worse mum. Vanity Fair alleged in 1992 that Love continued to shoot-up during the early stages of her pregnancy (she denies it) and as a result the couple were investigtaed by Child Welfare Services and the girl removed from their custody for a period. Love has been on and off the drugs over the years and as such in and out of rehab. She’s had run-ins with the law and after experiments in plastic surgery and extreme weight-loss, even looks like a complete mess.

Number 5: Jade Goody

I’m not one to kick when someone’s already down, but I have never been a fan of Jade Goody and so feel entitled to weazle her out as a bad showbiz mum. Goody has two sons, Bobby Jack and Freddie, from her rocky (violent) relationship with fellow reality TV star Jeff Brazier. Jade has not only endured public wrath over her apparent racism towards Bollywood star Shilpa Shetty, but also had her collar felt by the Police. She was arrested on suspicion of stealing a jacket from Asda, apparently punched a grandmother and was recently found guilty of two counts of driving without a licence and driving with no insurance, receiving a 6 month driving ban. All this and she can’t tell her left from her right – good luck kids, you’re going to need it.

The Top Five Acne prone Celebrities: Because even stars have bad skin days

It’s not fair and it’s not funny; spots my friend are no laughing matter, they can lead to scars, stress and seriously bad photo’s but yet we celebrate. And why do we rejoice? Is it out of the darkness of our mean little hearts? No it’s a celebration that celebs too can be human, and as open to bad skin days/ sweat patches/ and VPL’s as the rest of us mere mortals, therefore thankfully realigning the boundary ever so slightly and making us feel, well, more normal.

Number 1: Cameron Diaz

Yes, the super cute Shrek star, and all round surfer babe Cameron has had trouble of the pimpled variety, suffering nasty looking spots on her cheeks and the blush inducing rosacea on her forehead and throat. A diet of clean living, fruit juice and exercise soon put an end to the troublesome skin, and Cam returned phoenix like, even more beautiful than ever, snaring a trousersnake on her return to glory, then discarding him for other more grizzly animals..

Number 2: Alicia Silverstone

This Clueless star always seems to look peachy clean, but twas not always the case, proving the magic of some well placed concealer can apply even to the A listers. We know it’s not full blown acne, but even the pimples of the stars help us in our search for seeing the human withinn, and below those designer frocks and botoxed lips they have the same dimpling and spots that we do to.

Number 3: Jessica Simpson

This lady’s struggle with skin has been well documented, ending in her lucrative Pro-activ contract, so this is one woman who knows how to sell, and how to market herself. Bad hair day? Jess does hair extensions. Bad skin day? She sponsors a blemish cream. Bad bellybutton day?  She has her own line of bellybutton powder. (Really. This is a little to far) Now you can aspire to her skin should you buy the products, or you can really piss her off and get something from lil sis Ashlee’s range.

73521393Number 4: Billie Piper

Ex Dr Who hottie, former teen star and previous Mrs Chris Evans, Billie has been through a lot in her young years so perhaps it’s not that surprising that all that stress and hormone imbalance caused her skin to break out so vehmently, crying, ‘Water, water! No more beer..’ It’s all A OK nowadays though, and she’s even managed to snare herself a hot new boyfriend who has aims at husbandship..

Britneyeagle0207_468x519

Number 5: Britney Spears

It’s no surprise this once teen queen has suffered the curse of spots, after all, her fall from grace has been well documented, and it’s a rare day we don’t see her scoffing down a burger or slurping from Starbucks. Once she could do no wrong, then it all turned about head and suddenly even when she tries it seems that Britters just can’t do anything right nowadays, being hailed as a bad mother, a washed up singer, an overweight dancer (unfair) and pizzaface. Charming. I’m however of the pinion that all these media slights will make Ms Spears stronger than ever, and she’ll come fighting back with another annoyingly catchy song we can’t get out of our head.

And just to show that men suffer to..

LeoLeonardo DiCaprio!

Yes, this hunk of manhood and darling of Hollywood once suffered from the terrible teenage trauma of acne! i don’t know why this should warm us quite so much, but considering he went on to be the star of Titanic/Catch me you can/ Blood Diamond, I guess it just shows there’s hope for us all yet.

Top Five celebrity Flashers: The stars who can’t stop showing their naughty bits..

Seriously, Celebs just can’t seem to keep it under covers nowadays, be it a nip slip or a crotch shot there is far more flesh on offer than you want with your cornflakes. Of course, I’m sure there are a lot of men out there who appreciate all the ‘oops, i forgot my underwear.. again!’ shots, but a lot of us heartily wish they’d kept their knickers on. We ain’t talking all hot honeys either; there’s a lot of wrinkly flashes on offer, yummy! So this post is dedicated to the stars who just can’t keep it covered; some good, some bad, some just really sad.

Number 1: Britney Spears

Oops she did it again.. and again.. and again. Yes she is trying to make a comeback, but from the recent shots I have seen all the slips have been accidental.. and that means decidedly lacking a glamour factor. Yes, I know she’s a mum, and she’s battling baby weight and hair extensions, but there is no excuse for not covering those bosoms. It;’s not like she’s fifteen anymore and can get away with going bra-less.

See after the jump for more X rated flashers.

Number 2: Paris Hilton

These pics are crimes against the poor public eyes,, and fodder for picture hungry paps.. please, please, put it away Paris! At least while she’s locked up we’ll be spared all this fanny gazing rubbish she is so fond of, but on her release I’m sure the crotchless wonder will return. Her partying with Britney has done her no favours, as since Britters started hanging out Hilton style it was more than boobs that were getting revealed. At least we know they both favour the Hollywood wax (for the uninitiated, that means all off; like you can’t tell.)

Number 3: Janet Jackson

Who could forget that infamous duet with Justin Timberlake, or how he manfully tried to cover Janet’s bared breast from the flashing cameras. we;re talking serious wardrobe malfunction.. but it is slightly suss that she already had some sort of nipple clamp, attached, almost as if she was just waiting for that straining PVC to drop. To be fair, i can’t think of anyone who would voluntarily reveal that so it’s probably fair to say it was a genuine nip slip, unlucky for us.

Number 4: Lindsay Lohan and Mischa Barton

Now when the said nipple in question is attached to a perky pretty slip of a girl it somehow doesn’t seem as bad as when the oldies show off their goodies, but when you are young and attractive, do you really need to flash for attention? Lindsay and Mischa  would still of made the papers anyway, and I’m not sure how this these slips could really boost their career of profiles, other than ‘the wild child does it again’. Well, that’s more Lindsay to be fair, as Mischa is normally known more for her Chanel dresses than her boobs, but she does seem to have chosen an unfortunate top for the evening. White crochet with no bra?  It seems planned to me. Try something new for a change girls.

Number 5: Judy Finnegan

Who could forget that gaping greying bra that accidentally hit us bang slap in the middle of an awards ceremony? For a mature lady she certainly does fill it out, but still, invest in some more attractive, well fitting underwear before you air that monstrosity in public. I feel a promotion with Marks n Sparks coming on..? Richard must love those dumplings int he sack.. please  Judy, we love you really, but PUT THEM AWAY.

And the lesson for the day folks.. if it ain’t pre watershed we don’t want it. Celebrate your natural beauty and save the X rated pics for the bedroom. God bless.

Kate Middleton chooses vibrators over men

Kate is a girl after our own hearts. Rather than fretting about her messy public break up with the lovely Prince William she goes out and drinks her sorrows away. It seems she is putting men on the back burner for a while as when she attended the Rabbit Fever party, she was seen happily looking at the infamous rabbit vibe, and wearing bunny ears all night long.

No longer do women need to sit home bewailing their lack of a man,now sisters can do it for themselve; and with long life batteries we’re always guaranteed a good time. Hear hear the single revolution; with Kate spearheading it life has never been better.